Raspberry fool

We're still trying to convince Braeden of the benefits of sleeping through. We've had the odd morning he's played "find the dummy" a few times, and finally woken around 6am and said "Hello world, I need you to wake up because I'm about to play chairman of the bored and pass a motion!"

Last night was a bit different, however.

There were no dummy-hunts at all during the night, and his grateful parents got to bed at 9.45pm ( scant hour after His Lordship), and slept through until being woken (drenched?) by vigorous facial fartings from the cot beside the bed.

Yep, Braeden has rediscovered blowing raspberries, and he's rather good at it. Anyone/thing within six feet of him is in for a shower surplus to their usual morning one (but with more bubbles to make up for the lack of soap). Wayne thinks it's dreadful that I refer to the baby as Fartface, but I was brought up in the school of "the more offensive the terminology, the more I love you". It's a hard habit to break, especially when you lovingly call a friend "Oh you poxy bitch" and instead of a reciprocal insult of the compatriot, you see furious face and the door slamming behind their exiting ass. (Sheesh, was it something I said???)

Anyhoo, if you saw how well Braeden PHBBBLLLTTTTSSSSSSTTTSSS then you'd see what I meant. He let rip a real beauty last night, and his granddad (not realising it was the baby) glanced at me in surprise, then averted his nose towards the dogs. It's a worry when someone prefers the scent of two old dogs to oneself!! I did explain it was the baby, but the look changed to one of pity that I would blame my child for my dreadful sins.

And Wayne was no help.

"Oh blame the baby!" he exclaimed. "Some mother you are!!"

Bastard. (You know I love him, really...)

Anyhoo, I suppose hearing wet exuberances from the cot makes a change from the usual roar of chagrin we often hear, especially the other night when he woke up with a sore mouth. Bless the mums of our M&B group who advised me to try Baby Neurofen. I did (half the dose recommended for a 6 month old, just to be on the safe side) and it worked! In FIVE minutes, which beats the heck out of the 20-30 minutes it takes a pink gin to work.

Btw, speaking of the M&B group, when we arrived at our last meeting I had a burning question.

"At what age do babies start having tantrums?"

The general feeling was that "pretty much any time now" with "but wait until he's in the terrible twos, THEN you'll see a real tanty" with one Mum mumbling "My nine year old still throws them." (I know a certain #1 Grandmother who might say her 42 year old does, too .. but that would be a vicious rumour and I counsel you never to repeat it).

Anyway, a few minutes later Braeden spotted another baby who had a bottle. Never mind he'd just finished one himself (leaving nearly half behind & claiming to be full to bursting), oh no, he wanted that one. When he didn't get it, he threw himself backwards from the sitting position, and bucking like a bronco, he flailed his arms and legs vigorously while yelling his fool head off.

Suddenly the room went silent (except for Master Braeden, of course) and the other mothers watched in fascination.

Finally, one spoke. For all.

"Oh my God .... that IS a full-blown tantrum, isn't it!!!"

With my hand still trapped beneath his head (can't let him fall down uncaught, can I?), I nodded with a grin. Can't think where this kid gets his spirit from ;-)

...oo0oo...

And on a completely different topic, the time has come to give Telecom the bird.

Not only are they still refusing to honour the Kiwishare agreement (see, some of us still remember even if the Governments of years gone past have pretended to forget!) to upgrade every single telephone line in the country, apparently the "final" word is that they will never ever ever upgrade our pathetic country line. Ever.

And that came directly from Telecom.

But yet I still have to pay exactly the same fee as someone who gets broadband? Oh gimme a break!

So today I have signed up with their competition, and soon will get faster (but still dial-up) internet for less than half what Telecom have been charging me. Once I have updated my contacts with my new email addy, the change will be complete and it will be with a large dollop of relish I tell Telecom where to stick their lack of service.

Still pissy about no broadband, but who knows.. maybe this new service that is being trialled 50 kms south of me that uses electricity supply to deliver super-fast internet service will be adopted NZ-wide. (Ohhhh mummy wants!!!) Apparently wherever there is a power outlet, you can get telephone and thus internet, and at far faster speeds than our fastest broadband.

Unbundle THAT, Telecom :-)